I met one woman from two years ago while in Morocco during the most fragile time in my life that I am still grappling to come to terms with…thus I am still here, perhaps for a very long time. In that moment that sits like the elephant in the room, I forget how it always lives in me…losing my father and losing my first love.
I also found a Smithie, brilliant explaining the depression and the love that comes from living here. When asked where we wanted to be we both said Here. “Because you like it?” “No. Not at all.” But we love it, for what it does to us and to our identities. We sit and talk about the peace that is also a prison, the experiences with stalkers to our college heady intellectual relationships with lovers that we are forced to shed due to language. But it is brilliant to communicate like children and to hear her saying in broken English and perfect Darjia, “You don’t need to impress me with your mind. I see you.”