a friend has a birthday

a wonderful friend had a birthday and on the same day i fought with another good friend

both of these events made me come back to thinking of why i posted old photos. one reason is that the one closest to me had not been curious to ask about my history or maybe it was so distant culturally to find a middle ground or reference.

it has felt like two years of being mis/taken and i just wanted to see myself, where I have come from where i have gone and how much i have still to go.

i saw a happiness. a joy even when it was difficult. i saw a community of people, caring complex people.

i saw a story a bright one and mine. and i felt a thousand years roll off my shoulders. i let my timidness go. you can look at how wonderful i am. how beautiful i can be. if you love me. and you let me.

this is how wonderful we both can be. this is how you loved me. and this is what i remember.


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